Cousin Dupree by Steely Dan

There are songs that are so saccharine they can turn your stomach, but this song does it because it's so creepy. Okay, it's supposed to be ironic and humorous, but Donald Fagen's vocal is so sleazy that you feel like you need to have a decontamination shower after hearing it. It celebrates that old-fashioned Mid-Western tradition of fancying your close relatives, and coupled with Steely Dan's house style (fusion of prog-rock [ugh], jazz and blues) 'Cousin Dupree' just makes you wish they'd taken their experimental doodlings elsewhere.

Creepy lyric: From the comfort of my Aunt Faye's couch/ When I see my little cousin Janine walk in /All I could say was ow-ow-ouch

Verdict: Pass the soap and sponge, please.